Senator Larry Craig is a fag, so God hates him
Posted by Jesus on August 28, 2007
Senator Larry Craig (R-Idaho) was arrested a while back for attempting to engage in homosexual intercourse with an undercover police officer. He denies it, of course, as all good morally bankrupt politicians would, but we all know it’s true. Heck, in case there was really any doubt, Craig has even gone ahead and entered a guilty plea in the case. Not only is he a filthy homosexual deviant who is going to Hell, but he’s also too stupid to even hire a lawyer to attempt to mitigate the damage.
I’ve been quiet lately about the Michael Vick matter, mostly because we all know he’s going to end up in Hell. You don’t have to be in God’s inner circle to know that training dogs to fight for profit is a sure way to get damned. A story has emerged today though, and I want to say something about it. The NAACP, in its infinite wisdom, is suggesting that Vick be allowed to 
According to 
In 2000 Floridians elected a man to their House of Representatives named 
I’m so freaking sick of having to run off to deal with these damn muslim fundies who think bombs are an acceptable replacement for words. I was trying to spend a relaxing Independence Day week at Dad’s place on the lake with some friends, but nooooo-oooo, some idiot has got to go and try to enforce his stupid prophet’s will on everyone by blowing them up. What kind of logic is that?
Recently sentenced to Hell for all eternity and heiress to a future string of slum hotels, Paris Hilton is now once again walking the streets after a short stint in a government-run country club. Asked about her release, God is reported as saying “Paris? You mean that little whore with all the diseases and sex tapes?”
Most Christians know that Dad and I have the ability to listen to all of you at once. In fact, the machinations of Heaven are largely in place just to keep the few of you who make it here busy. We just play along to seem more human. In any case, sometimes I overhear something in my constant eavesdropping on all of you that just has to get immediate personal attention. Case in point: two 
Six Supreme Court Justices have, as of this morning, been damned to Hell for crimes against Americans. John Roberts, Antonin Scalia, Anthony Kennedy, Clarence Thomas, Stephen Breyer, and Samuel Alito will burn for all eternity for standing by a law which is not only immoral and grounds enough for complete contempt and overthrow of the Federal Government, but also has no better reason for existing but to maintain a crippling and dangerous criminal justice system functioning at high levels.
