Another “Devil made him do it” story

Posted by Jesus on May 20, 2007

Today’s Jesus Jackpot goes to a woman who tells it like it is. How many of you remember that story a while back about the lady microwaving her baby? Recently Joshua Royce Mauldin did the same to his daughter, severely burning the infant. There’s a twist though, and a pretty major one. Joshua is studying to be a shepherd, a minister in my flock. Of course Satan doesn’t want what would otherwise be a solid force for good in a community undertaking such a task, so the Devil himself obviously talked this young man into putting the child in the microwave. Obviously.

Eva Marie Mauldin, the wife of the accused and mother of the nuked baby has even said so. This is the mother of the child we’re talking about. Normally you’d see a woman going hysterical and demanding that the accused be put in jail, but Eva’s sight is much clearer than all that. She knows that her husband wouldn’t do this without Satan’s involvement. Well, of course Dad allowed it too, so really to punish Joshua would be to defy Him, but we’ll just leave that one alone today. It’s really best to just let the guy go, as he obviously bears no responsibility for his actions. Dad will sort Satan out for his part in the mess too, so there’s no reason to concern yourself there either.

Seriously, like I’ve said before (here and here), I don’t know why more Christians don’t support their own in cases like this. You all run around and pretend to believe that Dad is involved in all things and has a plan for all people, but when you’re confronted with one of your own in legal troule for following the Will of God (or in this case playing a small part in a spat between God and Satan) you just rock back and forth and pretend that some parts of the Bible aren’t to be taken quite so literally. Yeah right. That’s how Dad meant it.

You know what though, today’s supposed to be a good day. It’s Jackpot day. I’ll come back tomorrow on wrath day and teach some more lessons about your hypocrisies. So, um, today’s Jesus Jackpot winner is Eva Marie Mauldin for continuing to support her husband even after he microwaved their baby, because she knows, as do I, that it was not his responsibility – it was Satan’s. The Devil did indeed make him do it. Congratulations Eva!

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